Empty Jar, Only $525!

So this guy... He brought an empty mason jar to the premiere of Mr. & Mrs. Smith. He stuck the jar out when Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt walked by, then he sealed it. He claimed he caught the celebrities' "air."

He then sold it on E-bay for a healthy chunk of cash.

I don't know the exact amount, but Ananova said it was £293, which at current exchange rates is about $525.

Not bad, for a jar WITH NOTHING IN IT.

It is pathetic anyone would pay for it. I am disheartened and sad that I work my hindquarters off to make an honest living, when what I should be doing is selling stuff with no value.

Karma

As a cynic, I should've seen this one coming.

Freestar Media has taken steps to attempt to use the new Eminent Domain powers acquire property currently occupied by a privately owned residence to build the "Lost Liberty Hotel."

The current owner of the property?

Why, none other Supreme Court Justice David H. Souter! One of the five individuals responsible for allowing the expansion of Eminent Domain powers in the first place!

Now, I would be happier if the decision were just reversed. And I am never quite thrilled at reprisals of this nature (Two wrongs don't make a right, etc.). But I cannot help but to find this turn of events... Fitting.

Concerning Recent SCOTUS Decisions

When looking at recent decisions, I can come to no conclusion other than that the Supreme Court of the United States hates American Citizens that are not obscenely wealthy people who own large buisnesses. What drew me to this overtly cynical conclusion?

Case #1
The Decision: Last week, the Supreme Court ruled that local governments could seize private property from home owners and businesses, and give that property to corporate interests and private developers for the sake of generating more revenue.

The Effect: Everyday citizens lose their homes and businesses to corrupt officials and large corporate interests in the name of the Almighty Dollar.

Score: Big Business, 1; Average Citizen, 0.


Case #2
The Decision: Today, the Supreme Court ruled that large cable companies will not be compelled to lease the lines to smaller local competitors.

The Effect: Doing the exact opposite of what they did with telephone service (in which local carriers were required to lease their lines to long distance carriers, causing the cost of telephone service to drop due to increased competition), the Court has effectively slowed the spread of broadband to areas currently lacking it (Such as MINE) while simultaneously increasing the cost of said service to all areas. They've also made Time-Warner, SBC, etc, very happy.

Score: Big Business, 2; Average Citizen, 0.


Case #3
The Decision: Also today, the Supreme Court ruled that Peer-to-Peer file sharing services (Specifically, Grokster and Steamcast) could be sued because their services do not take active measures to prevent copyright infringement.

The Effect: Pandering to the MPAA and the RIAA, who are still going after P2P services despite the fact that taking down Napster did exactly jack shit, the Supreme Court has just cast doubt on any new emerging technology for sharing information, due to the fact they can be sued assuming that some over-paid corporate lawyer can convince a judge that the technology has shown "clear expression" to aid infringement. This has the net effect of slowing innovation due to fears of litigation, all because the entertainment industry is too stupid and slow on the uptake to provide a legal and comparable alternative service. (BitTorrent is probably next, by the way.) In today's atmosphere, the VCR would have never seen the light of day. (Also note: when the VCR and Betamax first came out, the MPAA also decried it as the downfall of the movie industry. Note, they're still here and have more money than ever, because they eventually embraced VHS rather than destroyed it.)

Score: Big Business, 3; Average Citizen, 0.


I could keep going. I really could, but I won't. I'll probably rant a little more about the Grokster decision tomorrow though.

---------------

But before I go, I have to talk about this:

The feeding frenzy begins. Freeport, TX officials have taken active steps to seize three pieces of waterfront property to build an $8 million private boat marina. The marina would be expected to attract hotels, restaurants, and retail establishments (which will likely be built through more Eminent Domain property seizures).

(Stupid part is, they're seizing the land from two seafood companies. One of the companies, Western Seafood, says that if they lost that tract of land, they would be forced to close the adjacent processing facility... The facility has been open since 1946 and makes $40 million annually... The city, of course, denies that the facility would have to close... but how is a seafood plant supposed to run without access to the waterfront?)

Slippery slope, folks, it's gonna get worse. I hope you don't live on a tasty morsel of land somewhere that someone with a lot of money wants.

Like Candy from a Baby

Okay, does This really seem like that good an of idea?

Health officials in Austria are taking away preschool & kindergarten children's toys away from them (Well, from the school toychests anyway). These "Toy-Free Kindergartens" are to somehow prevent them from becoming addicted to drugs and alcohol later in life.

...Wait, what?

Well, from what I gather, they think that (in a step-by-step basis):

1) Taking the toys away will force them to entertain themselves.
2) In the course of entertaining themselves, they will seek out playmates.
3) This interaction will a) make them socially integrated and b) more independent.
4) This social integration/independance will help them find a positive role.
5) This positive role will keep them from drinking and doing drugs.

Eeeeerrrrrmmmm, okay!

I'll give them 1 and 2. But that doesn't neccessarially follow through to 3,4, and 5.

And I'm not so sure that having a favorite toy has anything to do with drug use.

But I wish them luck! Have fun paying later in life for all the psychiatric bills your citizens will drop on you when they've been picked on by mean kids who were bored because they didn't have any toys to play with! :-P

Rock on, folks.

The Slow Painful Death of American Freedom

Well, today America died, just a little more.

Today, the Supreme Court issued a ruling that cities can take… steal would be my phraseology for it… private property from one private party (which, i'm assuming, will usually consist of a poorer-to-middle class family or a small Mom & Pop business) and award it to another private party (typically, I'm assuming, will be a rich corporation or a housing development firm), assuming the property would generate more revenue.

More. Revenue. Your local government can give your home to a corporation, because it will bring in more cash.

Mere words cannot express my current level of outrage. Has our society not been crushed by the weight of corporate-political greed enough that they must heap this final insult upon the common person? The fact that some bureaucratic stooge who has had his palms greased with sufficient amounts of cash by the right people can mark your home as condemned so they can bulldoze it and put up a strip mall is positively disgraceful. The rich and well connected already have a ludicrous amount of control over the affairs of our country as it is. Now they can legally seize property from people who’ve worked hard thier entire lives for what little they have? Destroy homes that have been in a family for over a century because the new hotel needs a bigger parking lot?

Where the hell are we, Zimbabwe? Because I can’t believe I’m still living in America.

Sorry, I’m too incensed to make much more of an argument without it degenerating into illegible ranting. I’ll call it a night, after one final rant directed at those responsible for this travesty:

Supreme Court "Justices" Stevens, Souter, Ginsburg, Breyer, and Kennedy… You have stabbed the citizenry of the United States in the back. I hope whatever Pfizer paid you so they could bulldoze homes at will was worth betraying basic rights you are supposed to be defending.

Have a nice fucking day.

Grand Theft Auto Doesn't Kill People, Whacko Fucktards Kill People

I ran across an article this fine evening. It was entitled "Can A Video Game Lead To Murder?" It was, of course, about the Grand Theft Auto series, and the supposed link between the videogame and real-world violence, highlighting where a teenager with no prior record killed three people and stole a car.

My thoughts on this link? Let me speak simply, so as all can understand.

BULLSHIT.

Once more, so the thick-skulled people can get it:

BULL. SHIT.

There is no "link." Video games do not "program people to kill." They are an excuse, a scapegoat. People go "Well, obviously, this child could NEVER have done this by himself. Let's blame the video game!" It makes people feel better that the cause of the terrible violence perpetrated was a "what" rather than a "who." All they have to do is pick the most violent video game around at the time, and demonize it.

It used to be "Doom." And then it was "Mortal Kombat." Now it's "Grand Theft Auto."

Kids, I've been playing video games as far back as I can remember. I've played Doom, and Mortal Kombat, and Grand Theft Auto. I've also played Halo, Unreal, Diablo, Duke-Nukem, and Half-Life. I've played more violent video games and experienced more virtual death and destruction than I can accurately recall. I even played this one game (the name, I forget), where you play an insane asylum inmate who is being hunted by the other inmates. The more violently you kill the other inmates, the higher you score! Wow, talk about gory!

The net effect of years of playing violent video games constantly?

Well, the last time I got into a (real) fight was 1996, and I didn't even start it. I use capture and release mouse traps, because I think ones that kill are inhumane (especially the glue ones!). I once spent an hour at work chasing a bird out of the store because I didn't want it to get trapped and starve.

Wow, man. Video games have made me stone-cold.

No sirs, sorry. If this kid killed people, it was the KID's FAULT. Not the video game, not Sony, not Take Two Interactive, not Wal-Mart... THE KID. HE killed three people. HE stole a car to try to get away. HE committed the crimes! I don't care if he didn't have a "prior record." All scumbags start somewhere.

Taking a quote from CBS here:

"There's plenty of blame to go around. The fact is we think Devin Moore is responsible for what he did," says Thompson. "But we think that the adults who created these games and, in effect, programmed Devon Moore and assisted him to kill are responsible, at least civilly."

"Programmed" him? "Assisted" him? Bullcrap. The programmers were working on GTA thinking "Dude, let's create an awesome game!" not "Dude, I hope that anyone who plays this game becomes a murderer!" Forgive me for my cynicism, but I think the key phrase here is "responsible, at least civilly." I have no doubt that some parties involved are grieving for loved ones lost and are merely lashing out so they feel vindicated, but Mr. Thompson, a lawyer and "crusader against video game violence" is thinking (however it is he justifies it to himself with the whole "doing it for the children" angle or whatnot) "Oooh, I can make MONEY off this!" Another example of sue-happy America!

So, to sum all my points up in a tidy little nutshell:

- If someone kills someone else, they haven't been "programmed." They're just sick fucktards. Refer to my earlier post on murderers being nuts.

- Video games have little to nothing to do with violence by these whackjobs. They merely act as a sacrificial lamb on the altar of public opinion, and reigning in "video game violence" will ultimately have no effect on actual crime rates.

- I'm not fond of lawyers. (I know they're not all bad... But that "few bad apples spoil the bunch" saying applies here.)

And one final thing. It says this guy purchased GTA as a minor. Parents: remember, there are ratings attached to the video games for a reason! If I hear one more time about how kids " turned violent after playing mature-rated video games" I'm gonna scream. Really.

But that's all I got, folks. Rock on.

Swordfighting Is Excellent Exercise.

Well, holy sweet mother of potatos, it's been almost a week since I last wrote in this thing!

I remember when I wrote in it every single day. Of course, that just made a whole lot of crap pile up in the blog that had nothing to do with anything. But I digress:

Recently, my cousin and I have taken up swordfighting. Fencing, Kendo, randomly hitting each other with practise weapons... Whole nine yards.

Why? That's asking the wrong question. I always prefer why not? It's fun.

It's also very... Tiring. We managed not to injure each other (not permanantly, anyways. My limp is pretty much gone, and my cousin's hand has regained most of it's flexibility) but we do get fairly exhausted after a few rounds. If I had known how good of exercise it was, I would have picked it up a long time ago.

Beats the hell out of baseball.

But I gotta go get an icepack. Rock on.

Nerd Worries

So one of my friends and I decided it was time, at long last, to restart my Dungeons & Dragons campaign. It was during the course of this that I discovered an unusual phenomenon.

In college, my D&D group consisted of up to eight players at a time. Shortly after college, this was whittled down to, at most, five. Five is fairly typical of a D&D group, so this wasn't a problem. However, a year after my last group ended, I am down to two players: my friend Joe and myself. This is typically insufficient.

So the call went out for new D&D players! Dwarves, take up yon Axes! Elves, prepare your bows! Wizards and warriors alike, gird thyself with spells and steel and prepare to carry the fight to Evil!

Or not. The conversation between Joe and a third person showing some mild possible interest in D&D went something like this:

"Why don't you send out a company-wide e-mail asking if anyone else wants to play?"
"Why me?"
"Well, because I don't want to seem like a nerd..."


What? Has fear of persecution really sunk into us so far that, in the midst of a company of software engineers… we are still afraid of being branded nerds?

It seems to be true. Many others, übergeeks all, refused to play. Some because they thought it was too geeky, even for them. Others because they were "afraid they would like it."

How can that be? I've talked about collecting comic books with these folks! We freely discuss the happenings on last night's Cartoon Network Toonami and Adult Swim. We photoshop for laughs. We discuss the philosophies of Star Wars. We make stupid jokes based on mathematical formulas. A lot of them program stuff... for fun. Can't we feel comfortable, even in our own social categories?!

Apparently not! It’s kind of sad really, but truth be told, you won’t catch me sending out the E-mail either! :-P

However, I would like to go on to say that I encourage everyone to play D&D or another Role-Playing Game, at least once. Find a good DM/GM (Dungeon Master, or Game Master, depending on the game ... They run the story) and sit down for a single session. I've found that the people you would think would be in D&D are not, while the people you wouldn't think would be into D&D absolutely love it.

For example, take the people I've played with. Out of the dozen or so I've DM'ed for in the twelve years I've been doing it (I've played since I was a little kid), about half were "Typical gamers." The others? Well, there was Mark, who is currently a bouncer. Then we had Jimy, an aspiring rock guitarist. There was Stan, who I believe is currently playing baseball for the minor leagues. And finally, I'll have to mention Gary, who at times looks like a stereotypical golden-haired rich surfer-boy, NOT a D&D player. These are the guys who if you were told played D&D would go, "No way! ...Really?"

(Yeah, yeah, I'm a sterotypical gamer. Bite me.)

But come to think of it, maybe I should send out that E-mail. For all I know, that hot brunette back in Support may want nothing more than to play an Elven wizardess. :)

And for the record: Vin Diesel plays D&D for Pete’s sake. If you think it’s nerdy, take it up with him!

Superman is a Dick

I went to a wedding this Saturday. I was a groomsman, even! But I must say, being in a tux in 90+ degree weather at high humidity ...well, it sucks hard.

BUT! That is irrelevant. Matt and Sara, enjoy your honeymoon!

Anyway, I've been working on those aforementioned essays... One small problem though, is that I'm a lazy bastard. (Not to mention, generally occupied.) I'll get them done, eventually, but not today. Sometime this week sounds good.

Maybe. Hopefully. With luck. … Nevermind.

Anyway, since I have nothing relevant, at least I can present something humorous.




National Lampoon's Superman is a Dick!

Have fun, it's a lot of laughs.

Self-Serve Checkout?

The Wal-Mart in my little corner of the world now has Self-Checkout. That is the freakiest thing I've seen to date.

Not that the idea isn't novel, because it is. It shall be very handy for someone like me; a guy who buys a few things at a time, can figure out a graphic GUI, and always pays with bills or credit card.

Ultimately, though, it is a bad thing. How? Quite simple.

By supporting large discount retail chains, such as Wal-Mart, we support low cost (usually at the expense of quality, but I digress). Americans are not low-cost workers, especially not in manufacturing goods and textiles. So, outsourcing occurs. We accept cheaper foreign goods to meet our price goals.

Eventually, the inevitable happens. Since we buy foreign goods more; Americans start to lose their jobs as no one is buying their products anymore. Americans must now take lower-wage jobs... such as working for Wal-Mart, the very devil that cost them the jobs in the first place.

SO: to recap, we have traded good jobs and high-quality goods for poor jobs and cheap goods. I would say the trade-off was a bad one, but who am I to disagree?

Oh yeah, I'm me... so... IT WAS A BAD TRADE OFF!!!

Anyway, now we have self-serve checkout lines. The ultimate effect?

With automated lines, who needs cashiers? Kiss more jobs goodbye.

So now we traded many high end jobs for fewer low end jobs.

The bad trade just got worse.

Patent Trolling

Wired magazine recently posted a brief interview with Forgent's CEO, Jay Peterson. It discussed Forgent's claim that they owned all the rights to the popular, and originally free, JPEG image compression format. Forgent has sued 31 companies, including Apple, Dell, Kodak, Xerox, and Microsoft over their supposed "ownership." After this, they're moving on to TiVo and Replay, which, due to another patent, they also claim they have the rights to royalties over anything DVR.

This, good readers, is a process known as Patent Trolling. Through the... *ahem* ..."Reinterpretation" of existing patents that have little or nothing to do with the matter at hand, the companies in question demand royalties for "their" inventions.

A second, and even more reprehensible, method is applying for a patent for something that already exists, but is not covered by a patent. For example, the ubiquitous Progress Bar (the little bar that goes across the screen to tell you how far a task such as an installation or download has gone) was actually patented!

In another case, a popular Japanese "Ichitaro" word processor was ordered to be destroyed years after the fact, because a competitor said that it owned the patent for the Help icon!

For a pretty good (if over-stylized) list of ten bad ones, read the Electronic Frontier Foundation's "Most Wanted" page.

Although my love for the "Big Companies" like Microsoft, Apple, and Dell is measured in quantities so small they are not worth being measured, this practice is a danger to innovation and small companies trying to make it big on original ideas. A single lawsuit can destroy a small company, or even shake the foundations of larger ones. It represents one of the major problems with our current patent system.

As is usual, the bad guys don't see it as a problem. Bad guys never see themselves as bad guys, it never works that way. Through the miracle of rationalization, they see themselves as victims, or even public benefactors.

For example, the spokesperson for the company behind the shutdown of the Ichitaro word processor said ""We are a global enterprise and we are just following international practice to enforce our IP rights." (I.E., victim mentality.)

Forgent's CEO claimed "We're injecting the proceeds from the patent into other technologies, other businesses. We'll be able to create new opportunities, growth, and technologies, and more jobs and careers for talented engineers, in addition to rewarding our shareholders." (I.E., benefactor mentality.)

(Of course, when the person realizes someone doesn’t have the same viewpoint, it leads to situations like the abrupt termination of the Wired interview. No one wants to hear that their rationalizations are flawed.)

But rationalized or not, making your way on someone else’s hard work through legal fiat is wrong, plain and simple. It will, bluntly, put another nail in the coffin of innovation. It will destroy many small companies along the way. It will cost consumers millions (as the money financing lawsuits has to come from somewhere). And it will lead to more profiteering by other individuals and corporations looking to find a payday in someone else’s hard work.

Only through patent reform, specifically people with true computer knowledge in charge of granting computer patents, can this be solved. Reform, kids! Reform!

Memory

Ever notice how arbitrary human memory is? We'll remember some things forever, and other things not even a day.

For example, I have no recollection of what I worked on Monday. That'll be a pain in the ass when I record my weekly statistics for the powers-that-be.

However, I just sang the full lyrics to Megadeth's Countdown to Extinction. I have not heard that song in eight years.

Just and observation, is all.

The Race Reflex

No, still no "American Society" posts. It was a busy day. But I do feel a good rant boiling up.

I was driving along, at a speed ...er... slightly in excess of the limit. I was in the passing lane because, of course, I was passing cars. As I went to pass a pickup truck, I came to the sudden realization that despite the fact I was going significantly faster than the truck when I started to pass, I was no longer passing them. I checked my speed... Yep, same speed.

I looked over at the truck, just as the three idiots in the truck were cheering and giving each other high-fives.

They were celebrating that they had prevented me from passing.

This was one of the more obvious instances of what I have termed the "Race Reflex." It seems there are some monkeyheaded cockbites who, when presented with a car that wants to pass them, take it as a personal insult and/or an excuse to drag race.

They don't typically celebrate, but it has been happening to me with an ever increasing frequency. (Which is odd, because I don't drive nearly as crazy as I did even two years ago.)

At its best, it's immature and annoying. Typically, after preventing the other car from passing, they will resume their original speed and, subsequently, the reason the other car tried to pass them to begin with. The process begins anew, with the poor sap trying to pass left very unhappy. Plus, messing with the flow of traffic is a) Rude and b) Probably illegal.

At worst: People, other drivers make quick decisions on if they should pass a car or not. On a two lane road (You know, where the passing takes place in the lane where opposing traffic travels) speeding up and preventing a person from completing a pass effectively blocks a lane. That could, in turn, lead to an oncoming car hitting the person attempting to pass: damaging the passer, the oncoming car, and probably you.


Not to mention, someone could potentially get Killed.

In short: if you want to drive like dipshits who pulled their licenses out of cracker-jack boxes, do it on your own time, Twinkie. Stay the hell out of my way. I have no desire to be run off the road, killed, or even so much as inconvenienced by you NASCAR fanboys (Hint: You are the NASCAR fans who give all other NASCAR fans a bad name) who think they need to be in front of everyone else on the road.

Let's hope you all learn your lessons before you hurt someone or are the victims of a Road-Raging maniac.

Rock on, and drive safe.

Hatsumi Guide, Updated

I surrender. According to SiteMeter, except for my visits to check that everything looks good, nearly 99.9% of my hits are now directly related to those trying to find the damn Jessica Chobot PSP picture. My blog has become Hatsumi’s bitch. So wander on over to the Hatsumi Guide. I’ve completely redid the entry to include recent information, which is the only time I will go back and rewrite something on my site. Ever.

I figure, you people are bothering to come here, I might as well give you the information you seek.